CBT – Understanding some of your negative thinking

There will be times when others project their own insecurities, fears, sadness, and disappointments, on to you – and at other times, you might do the same to others, and life situations.

One of the things I teach clients who come to me for CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy), is to begin understanding their automatic thoughts.  Below is a list of some of the common automatic thoughts we all have to some degree.  However, how often, and how intrusive these thoughts are, maybe a ‘symptom’ of an underlining issue that might benefit from some attention, greater exploration, and care.


As said, some of these are common to some degree, so as therapists, we work to openly explore these thoughts (and there roots), with you – without negative judgement.


I hope you find these helpful.


From, Novena-Chanel


  1. Mind Reading. You assume that you know what people think without having

sufficient evidence of their thoughts “He thinks I’m a loser”.

  1. Fortunetelling. You predict the future negatively. Things will get worse, or there

is danger ahead “I’ll fail that exam,” or “I won’t get the job.”

  1. Catastrophizing. You believe that what has happened or will happen will be so

awful and un-bearable that you won’t be able to stand it. “It would be terrible if I failed”.

  1. Labelling. You assign global negative traits to yourself and others. “I’m undesirable,” or “He’s a rotten person.”

5. Discounting positives. You claim that the positive things you or others do are trivial.

“That’s what wives are supposed to do – so doesn’t count when she’s nice to me.” Or

“Those  successes were easy, so that don’t matter.”

  1. Negative filtering. You focus almost exclusively on the negatives and seldom notice the positives. “Look at all of the people who don’t like me.”
  1. Overgeneralizing. You perceive a global pattern of negatives on the basis of a single incident. “This generally happens to me. I seem to fail at a lot of things.”

Continue reading “CBT – Understanding some of your negative thinking”

Transform ‘knowing of’ to actually ‘knowing’

How many people do you know that keep on ‘telling you’ how long they ‘think’ they have known you for?

You know, the person you attended school, college, football or dance with… like 20 something years ago.
You briefly kept in contact; the odd chance meeting on the street, the exchanging of numbers; the random texts every couple of years… the most recent Facebook pokes lol and status updates… Yet they seem to think they ‘know’ you.
Yesterday, a well known radio DJ who I ‘knew’ from Play Centre, said he has known me for about 28 years… The fact of the matter is,
he has ‘known of me’ for XX years, he does not know me, in the here and now.
People, we need to stop signing virtual references for people that we knew, but do not actually know, now.
What is that persons hobbies?
Where do they live?
When last did you use the toilet in their home?
How would they react to disrespect (now, not in the past when you were in school)?
What is their life plan?
What is their parents/siblings/children/partner’s names?
Where do they work and what is their job title?
If the above is difficult to answer, you don’t ‘know’ them, you know of them.
Something to think about, right?
Get to know those who you think you know.
Copyright © 2013. All Rights Reserved. Novena-Chanel Davies.